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Name: Allen
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Member Since: 2/23/2004

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Sunday, April 20, 2008

Brand New Start - China

After going thru all decisions making i'm finally here for a new start... Guangzhou, China -

It was cool the first few days, clients were comin over from Russia and Korea so there were many preparation for us to do...

Get up at 8... work in the office til 4, then start visiting factories til 8, dinner, more factories to go ... got home aroudn 11-12ish .. tired but exciting day ... realize there's much more for me to learn and it's gonna take a while...

Generally things are going alrite, what drives me crazy the most is the time when I don't need to O.T, can't go anywhere else cus i don't know anyone or ANYWHERE!! So i'm kinda forced to go home, this is the fucked up part, there's no internet, just a TV with channels showing some Chinese show i dont' know wtf is going on... i can only sit on my bed topped with a tent that helps blocking all the mosquito from biting the shit out of me. That's all i can do for the whole nite... For those who knows me would know... i get bored very easy and this kills!!! I rather O.T and have soemthing to do to kill time, sitting down and watch mosquito flying around's just not the way to go... ooo well this is for work i can't complaine too much, things will get better i'm sure

 ooo one thing i gota mention...  we were having dinner in a restaurant, food was good, good conversation with the team... waiting for my mango desert to be served...  suddenly i stepped on some food under the table, i tried to kick it to the other side of the table but its a big piece and greasy i was thinkin who dropped such big piece of pork chop under the table... so i lifted the cloth ....

 

 

200804161703 200804161702

 

Yes!! Welcome to China!!!


Sunday, December 16, 2007

Another day without her...

is Just another day without any excitment and love.....

Just the same as yesterday and the day before....

Sigh....


Friday, December 14, 2007

新生活

日子一天天的過去, 不驚不覺已經一個星期...

身邊很多朋友都支持我,關懷我.....但千千萬萬的他們, 都不及她以往的一點關心和在乎...如果有她現在在我身邊度過這難關.... 有多好...

新生活的體驗, 不是沒有她之後的好處, 而是覺得......錯失太易..... 愛得太遲...

她以往為我做的每一樣東西, 都一一回到我的腦海中...真的真的很甜.... 現在覺得很酸... 只恨自己當初為何不懂"APPRECIATE"和不懂珍惜.... 人.... 不... 我就是這麼賤吧...

現再... 去過的地方.. 做過的東西... 一起過的節日.... 都勾起我太多的回憶....

昨晚和frd去紅墈海傍散心..... 回想起上年她生日在這裡送"那" 份禮物給她的情景.... 當初也是在這裡開始的... 心酸起來就想哭...  能在朋友面前哭嗎...

昨天去過很多的地方... 都充滿著我們的回憶... 我們之間...真是太多回憶....不竟一回來HK就差不多跟她一起... 我在香港的回憶很多都有她的份兒....sudocku...脊骨醫生...跌打...搬倉...紅螞蟻.... LCX....星光大道的雪糕... 聖誕燈飾...  boat trip... 天橋上的酒bar.... 1A巴士...  CubicMore... 炭爐邊爐..貓頭鷹..海傍....太多太多..

她送給我的頸鍊.... 很喜歡....真的很喜歡...它是她送給我唯一可經常帶在身邊的東西... 沒她在身邊..唯有用它來頂替....

好傻... 走路時掛念她... 會不自禁吻它一下.... 晚上睡覺時... 會緊握著它... 戴著它雖令我不能入睡, 箍著脖子覺得很辛苦... 也不捨得把它除下....  直自睡到很朦朧才不自覺的把它脫下... 是暗示著... 要脫下的...始終都要脫下嗎...??

太多的事發生了....我沒有什麼可選擇...現在才懂得去愛...太遲了吧 AllenT....

我知到我不應在這裡寫這些東西, 因為她會看到而不捨放抵.... 但我也想他人知到我平時沒有說的感受吧....

沒法可配合 共你一對
不應該記掛著誰

始終兩腳難後退

但再伴隨 恐怕沒法別去

別這種態度  極之乾脆
約見面藉口諸多 說要推

如果不想再面對 慘遭負累
無謂再做朋友 願告吹

我會消失 讓自己一個抑鬱
沒料到絕情 絕得送上這種惡疾
來日裡 我也怕再度共對
與對方不碰面奢望便可減退

盡快消失 為自己一個呼吸
盡是再動情亦知性格太不合 隻好退隱
 
誰人令我這麼固執

是有種隔膜 沒法攻破
都可否念於當初 吻過麼
如果騷擾你是我 
不勝負荷
寧願斷絕來往 就這麼

我會消失 讓自己一個抑鬱
道謝你絕情 絕得送上這種惡疾
來日裡 你與我各自賣醉
再也不知你於週末怎麼生趣
盡快消失 為自己一個呼吸
若令你動情或者我永遠不及
即管退隱 誰人令我這麼固執

心掙紮每日 
日夜都因你抑鬱
就讓我絕情地放棄愛你
是千夫所指的過失
遺忘後隻想一個人 
不再願行近


Friday, September 07, 2007

What should I do?

It has been a month... seems like time still not doin its work..

This is probably the worst moment since her father's gone... and yet i can't do anything about it, i can't comfort her, i can't be there for her, i can't put her to sleep, i can't be there when she woke up by nightmare,

It has been soooo long, too long, i haven't seen a smile on her face... if I knew i would hurt her so bad, i wouldn't let it start in the first place...

Dear God, I haven't talk to u for so long, are u here, are u still here with me?? Could you please lay ur hands on her? And take away all burdens and put it on my shoulder?

You did it before, i know you can do it again....

I wish i'm different...and many other things too... God.. only u know ...

Can you bless her, just like the way you blessed me in the pass? Please?

May be it's just wrong that i'm here... God... u know how terrible I'm...

ooooo... such a long day today.... so lost... so confuse... i need ur guidance my lord....

Ar Bak, grandpa, Por Por E, i'm sorry...

ooooo... everything's just wrong here.... but don't worry... I'll be strong... I'll at least try...


Saturday, August 25, 2007

Why bad things happen to good ppl?

This is my first time writing an entry on xanga, i ain't a xanga person but sure its a good way to share ur feelins to your frds and everyone...

So exhausted from the trip from China and clubbin at LKF last nite, woke up this morning by joey's call, wasn't so sleepy after hearing such shocking news from her.. her cousin Alex was killed in a fatal car accident in Singapore last nite... i don't want to get into that..

Alex, just a 19 years old boy, although he looks 30, met him when he came to HK for vacation last winter. Very friendly dude, loves cars and beer...  that's all he talks about. Also met his parents and younger bro Max during Chinese New Year, super nice parents, tight family, his father was askin me for advice rather he should send Alex to Canada or the States, i suggested Halifax instead of Vancouver just to tease him cus he can never stand to be bored. Just before he went back home he was teaching english in HK for a bit then went back to Singapore prepare his frosh year at UBC.... he was suppose to leave for Vancouver in few days....,

For real i don't understand, as refer to my title of this, why shit things happens to good ppl?  I mean hes so young and have such exciting, brilliant future waiting right in front of him, still so much he hasn't adventure yet... and God just took him away like that... breaking so many so many hearts and one happy family (he's quite a popular guy check his facebook if you get a chance, got lotsssss of frds,  becos of his frdly characteristic i bet ) May be he's still very young and needs lots of lessons, but don't you think this lesson just cost wayyyyyy tooo much?? This changes many things forever... i can't imagine how badly the damage will be done to the family, but i hope God will bless them and not let them walk alone.. i'll pray for all you all...

Alex, we'll reminisce all the memories and time we spent together, we'll always miss you... and love you.....

 

In loving memories of Alexander Henry Davies ...

April 17th, 1988 ~ August 25th, 2007

 n501869254_95058_1486

P.S Here's song for you my boi

 

I'll be missing you - P. Diddy

Yeah... this right here
Goes out, to everyone, that has lost someone
That they truly loved



Seems like yesterday we used to rock the show
I laced the track, you locked the flow
So far from hangin on the block for dough
Notorious, they got to know that
Life aint always what it seem to be (uh-uh)
Words cant express what you mean to me
Even though youre gone, we still a team
Through your family, Ill fulfill your dream (thats right)
In the future, cant wait to see
If you open up the gates for me
Reminisce some time, the night they took my friend (uh-huh)
Try to black it out, but it plays again
When its real, feelings hard to conceal
Cant imagine all the pain I feel
Give anything to hear half your breath (half your breath)
I know you still living your life, after death


Every step I take, every move I make
Every single day, every time I pray
Ill be missing you
Thinkin of the day, when you went away
What a life to take, what a bond to break
Ill be missing you

I miss you big

Its kinda hard with you not around (yeah)
Know you in heaven smilin down (eheh)
Watchin us while we pray for you
Every day we pray for you
Til the day we meet again
In my heart is where Ill keep you friend
Memories give me the strength I need (uh-huh) to proceed
Strength I need to believe
My thoughts big I just cant define (cant define)
Wish I could turn back the hands of time
Us in the 6, shop for new clothes and kicks
You and me taking flicks
Makin hits, stages they receive you on
I still cant believe youre gone (cant believe youre gone)
Give anything to hear half your breath (half your breath)
I know you still living youre life, after death

somebody tell me why

On that morning
When this life is over
I know
Ill see your face

Every night I pray, every step I take
Every move I make, every single day
Every night I pray, every step I take
every day that passes
Every move I make, every single day is a day that I get closer to seeing you again
Every night I pray, every step I take
we miss you big... and we wont stop
Every move I make, every single day cause we cant stop... thats right
Every night I pray, every step I take
Every move I make, every single day we miss you big

 

Rest in Peace my brother.....

 

AllenT



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